2007 Long Feature: My Frugal Valentine
With Valentine’s Day right around the corner, two bargain-hunting Atlanta residents find a style of romance that doesn’t break the bank.
They both love art festivals and have to stop for a minute. There are too many colors to count on this Sunday. Brookhaven swells in a vibrant plumage of artwork and crafts. The sun captures the blues, reds and yellows, casting them in a stain-glass aura over the white tents. Children jump around the insides of an inflatable bouncing tent. Other children are pushed lazily in strollers by parents, too young to play on the inflated toys. Delicious smells of hamburgers, french fries and funnel cakes interweave with the crowd caravaning down the exhibits. They love walking along the Brookhaven Art Festival, mesmerized with the vibrant atmosphere.
Horn, brushing back brown hair, stops in front of an artist’s display. Her vibrant use of colors is what made Horn stop. The scenic paintings are filled with blue, Horn’s favorite color. Blue is also the color of Horn’s eyes. Tucking both hands into the deep shorts pockets, Horn continues to look around a bit.
“It’s easy [for Ludell], always striking up a conversation with anyone,” says Horn, thumbing in the direction of Ludell. “I’m not that outgoing.”
Ludell steps into the tent to get a closer look, engaging in conversation with the artist. Ludell’s dark hair is cut close. Proud of working out, Ludell exposes trim arms in an athletic tank top. Ludell, the networker, is just as willing to hand over a business card. Ludell works for a Public Broadcasting Atlanta. Talking is necessary for the job performed for PBA. The fascination right now is the artist’s work and techniques.
This weekend they are dog- and house-sitting for a friend. Tucked away in a quiet cluster of Brookhaven, a brick two-story mansion rolls up its garage door to allow the two temporary occupants in. The spacious abode is more like an elaborate maze of rooms, stairs and more rooms. Two schnauzers greet arrivals at the entrance inside of the garage. Horn and Ludell make themselves at home.
“Give them a cube of ice,” suggests Horn. Two cubes of ice slide across the tile floor. Two small, furry bottomed dogs skate across the floor after it. The quiet home is filled with crunching as both dogs retrieving a piece of ice.
The patio is gorgeous. The pair step outside, walk up a small trail of stepping stones and toss fish food into a koi pond at the top of the hill. Koi leap at the granules, splashing water with delight.
Ludell tries to find the patio chairs’ cushions, but Horn had already sat in a bare chair, patting the other one as suggest for Ludell to sit. It is Horn’s time to do some talking.
Thirteen years ago, they met each other in a bar. Horn had come to meet a best friend; Ludell had been looking for a friend from long ago. A mutual friend introduced the two. They loved each other’s name since it was similar, dropping the ‘c’ off one of their names. Ludell persuaded Horn to do something never done before.
“Here I am, the first night in Atlanta. I meet somebody and I take my shirt off and dance up on a box,” says Horn, pressing palm to cheek, reflecting on the embarrassment of losing inhibitions. “We were young then.”
They learned about each other during a conversation and meal at the Majestic Diner at four in the morning.
“It was five in the morning,” states Ludell. Ludell remembers specifics about the date, but is pretty silent. Horn is the talkative one.
In the early life of the relationship, Ludell knew everyone in Atlanta, unlike Horn. Ludell introduced the plethora of friends and controlled the relationship. Horn is from Pennsylvania and was still living there when Ludell asked Horn to move to Atlanta. They both had trouble with their relationship because of the long distance between them. Ludell had had previous long distance relationships to go bad because the person never wanted to be closer.
“[Ludell] would call every night and ask me when I was coming,” Horn remembers. Ludell shifted in the chair. Horn pats Ludell’s knee, continuing, “I was leaving all of my friends and family to move to Atlanta. I had a job. I couldn’t just drop everything instantly to be with [Ludell]. It wasn’t fair for [Ludell] to force me into moving. I kept saying, ‘I’m coming, but I need time to get everything in order.’”
Ludell admits that controlling the relationship was not a good decision. “I had gotten myself into the same situation I had been in before. I kept trying to break up with [Horn] because in my mind I didn’t “shacking up” was an option. I really didn’t want to be hurt again.”
Ludell was telling Horn what to wear and what hairstyle to have. Horn wanted to be different.
“I liked my hair long, t-shirts and jeans,” emphasizes Horn. “I take after my father, so we butted heads about my appearance.” Ludell had learned the hard way that Horn was not going to be controlled, especially when it came to activities they liked to do.
“We love going to parties and bars together. We like to stay together, but we can also party without each other. Most of our friends cling to each other every time they go out,” says Horn. They both look at each other and mimic whiny voices of their friends trying to find their significant others.
Horn and Ludell have their favorite, separate activities. Ludell perks up. A smile spreads the mouth; Ludell’s eyes widen with excitement. He begins, “I love grocery shopping. I know it’s not a typically fun thing like dancing and stuff. But I love grocery shopping. It’s something that I do often without Horn.”
Ludell looks over at Horn. “It’s nice being away from each other every now and then. I can’t sleep when [Horn] is gone cause that instinct kicks in. I worry that [Horn] is okay.” Ludell rubs Horn’s shoulder. “But it’s nice to have that time alone. It’s a ‘me’ time when I can be really be myself instead of part of a duo.”
“Yeah, it’s nice to have that ‘me’ time,” chimes in Horn.
There are some changes that Ludell and Horn would like to make about each other and themselves. Ludell holds a grudge towards Horn’s “rat-packing” collection of outdated magazines and ability to sleep till noon. Horn nags about Ludell not taking advice and leaving stuff in the middle of the floor.
“[Ludell] will leave stuff in the middle of the floor, but my collection is in the closet,” says Horn right as an acorn falls from a nearby tree onto Ludell’s head. They have a good chuckle before Horn hollers out, “Incoming!” Ludell pretends to be knocked out. Horn admits that he really loves this house and house-sitting for this friend.
“I would love to find a house like this within our budget,” says
Ludell hopes that they can one day get a house. They are both happy with the apartment, but dogs are their want for the future. The two dogs they are sitting this weekend peek out of the miniblinds, looking at the couple sitting in the chairs and then running off to play. They prefer having a yard to let the dogs run in. House-sitting gives them a taste of what homeownership is like.
“It’s like a little vacation for us. It’s outside of our place. Our friends are great about leaving food and stuff for us,” says Horn.
“Plus we get to do laundry without having to go to the laundromat in the complex,” says the thrifty Ludell.
Money is not plentiful with this couple. Horn works in the Fulfillment Department at Macy’s and repeats that the pay is not great. Plus, Ludell’s job at PBA is not a sustaining income. However, they make a dollar stretch and take pleasures in the simple, and cheap, events.
“We go to art shows, matinee movies, anywhere that is cheap,” says Ludell.
“Or we can sneak food into,” laughs Horn.
“We wait till the day after Valentine’s to get good bargains,” says Ludell.
Horn nods in agreement. Valentine’s Day and other holidays really dig into their wallets. However, they have found ways around the pricey sticker of romance.
“There should be no reason why a dozen roses is jacked up to $75 just for one day,” complains Horn. “Besides, roses are so cliché.”
Ludell grins and thumbs at Horn, “But you-know-know loves to get roses.”
“I do, but the day after Valentine’s, they’re so cheap. I’d rather wait than to spend $75 on something that will die in two or three days. We usually wait till after the holiday to get good deals on gifts and food. Lobsters are cheaper afterward, too,” chirps Horn. “Otherwise, we usually just go places that are free or inexpensive. Like today with the art show.”
Ludell caresses Horn’s knee. “Yeah, the art show today was great. Lots of colors we like. There was the guy with the Art Deco posters of Atlanta. We saw him at another festival, but he didn’t have a particular poster we were looking for.”
Horn holds up a pack of greeting cards purchased from the artist. “We couldn’t afford the posters, but he had these cards. We figure we can frame these to decorate the apartment with.”
Neighbors begin letting their dogs out for the afternoon. Their dogs are noisy. Ludell and Horn are not happy with the constant noise of the neighbor’s dogs. The dogs they are sitting are quiet and playful. Dogs are the main reason they offer to house sit for their friends. A couple from next door watches their dog play, then stares at Horn and Ludell holding hands. They [Horn and Ludell] both wave to the couple. The couple ponders the gesture, then sheepishly waves back at the duo.
Horn plays with curls of hair, “You know what I hate? When our straight friends find out that we are gay.”
“We’re normal, per the ‘heterosexual mentality.’ A lot of our friends didn’t know we were gay. Our straight friends who find out we are a gay couple,” Ludell says, slapping his hand to his knee, chuckling, “try to hook us up with their other gay friends.”
“Oh yeah, that nice ‘Oh I had the most wonderful gay guy for you to meet. You two would hit it off perfect.’ We have to remind them that I’m with Rik and he’s someone that I want to spend the rest of my life with,” says Horn.
Ludell gets tickled, “Yeah and then they get this puzzled look on their faces like ‘I thought you guys were promiscuous.’ It’s a riot and a sign that they are the promiscuous ones. Being gay isn’t about being a sex fiend.”
Horn gives his two cents, “It’s not all about sex with us either. We’re not pedophiles out to kidnap your children. We’re not diseased.”
Horn and Ludell admits that they have had it better than most of their gay friends. Their families have been supportive of their relationship. Ludell was deeply touched with Horn’s father introduced him to the family’s Catholic priest as “Rick’s life partner.” Ludell also convinced his father to tell their friends that Rick was his partner.
They are not afraid to go where they want to go. “I like being able to go to the big gay parties, but I love the fact that we can also hang out with our straight friends and feel comfortable,” says Horn. Their future includes each other, no children and two dogs. They are in love. And after thirteen years and counting, they both believe they have a cool relationship. They now wait for the rest of the world to be cool with their relationship.
